Oooh. Hey. Hi. I’m Kayden. I’m a Mul. Hey! Have you ever heard a lizard sing? I’ll have to show you how to do that. But first, let me tell you about this strange warrior woman I met the other day. She’s weird. And tough.
And Bart. He’s different somehow. I remember him, big tall and ugly at Restinford, but he was different. His focus was on love and peace. But now, something is different. He’s … different. Strong. Not mean, but not at peace with himself. He’s torn inside. Broken. Shattered. Wounded.
Oh, hey, and I met the strong lady gal in Restinford. They have good milk there. We talked to the rich kid… the Baron’s daughter. I think her name was Lucy. Or maybe Sally… ooh! Oooh… Sadistic. No. Saradista? Anyway, she said that this flower thing can be found back in my old haunt near my desert. But there’s a dark secret. Unfortunately, we don’t know what that secret is. The rich kid said something about a death book. Book of death. Dead book of deathly deadness. Skeltor’s pages. Papier De Muerta. It’s at castle Hagthar and it can tell us a secret.
And that’s the problem. Hagthar. A word created by the Dragonborn. I think it means big-ugly… but don’t tell them that. It’s a great architectural city that is now receding into ruin. They are so distracted by their studies and their research to know that their buildings are falling in around them. That, or their dumb. No. Nope. No, they’re not dumb. They’re big. Mean-big. Not that they’re mean. Their just big enough that if they are mean, whoever they are mean at will be in trouble. Big trouble. Big, scaly, ugly trouble. (* shudders *)
With army lady taking responsibility for food and Bart taking responsi… well, for being Bart — we were doing great. We had a plan, we had a map, and we had food. We were on schedule, and nothing seemed to get in our way. Plenty of food. It was dry, but I could make it tasty with a well-placed rune or two. And just before we get ready to stop for the night, we were ambushed by two big wolves. Big. BIG-big-big. Big. Huge.
I drew my staff and tried to scribe as many runes into the air as I could remember. Master taught me well. They were tough, though. Some of my runes didn’t have much effect on them, but I was able to help the warrior lady and the beast fend them off.
I willed a rune into stone, and it glowed red — the surefire symbol of rage and destruction. I could feel the anger boiling inside me, taunting me and tearing at my soul to bash the wolves heads in and eat their brains. And I don’t even like brains. They’re mushy. I like milk better. Good milk, not lizard milk. I know what you’re thinking… lizards are not mammals, thus don’t have mammary glands. But they do produce a slimy substance from their tails. We called it lizard milk. It’s gross. Ecch.
I just hope that when we get to Hagthar, they’ll remember Titus. He’s nice. Big orange lovable guy. Very friendly. I hope the others are nice as well, or we’re in trouble. Bart and the Dragonborn may be a bad mix. Like putting a lizard in a pit with a werehog.
And I think we’re the lizards.